when i found you
your eyes were spotlights burned
against the background of the night
your level face a row of strings
and banners, flags of light
captured as a camera might
you stayed that way until morning

the kids squeal and run off to the tree
it is quite beautiful –
i detach my lens and assume this is when it’s going to go out
right when i decide to leave
right when i turn my back to walk out
the glow will snap shut
the reflections in the store windows will vanish
and the kids will audibly groan, but we just got here
but it never does

i eventually give up,
defeated by boredom, by cold,
by power,
an incorrectly set timer, defeated by
city government, the parks department
turning on me at last! et tu!
by bureaucracy
failing to do the simplest task
of turning off the lights when the park closes
or worse, deciding to leave it on!
for who?
apparently for these two kids, age 6 or 7 ish
who come barreling into the park just as i am packing up
with their
tiny mother trailing, curious about my camera
curious about me bent sad over it
in the shadow of the tree, the unvanquished tree,
christmas, undefeated still!

on my way home i stop by the small park by the subway
to shoot some b roll
of the christmas tree the city put up
there are some feral cats about
darting in and out of the hedges
casting disorienting shadows as they go
waiting to get a shot of the lights going out
they’re supposed to go out at 9
but it’s now approaching 9:05 and i’m
still waiting for this shot, who knows why
i don’t even know what point i’d be trying to make
i’m not trying to be dramatic, or negative,
it just seemed like a cool image
or whatever the 4D version of an image is,
a sequence of images, depicting some change
