manhattan – Page 3 – Sunshine and Wind

inside/outside (2)

i drift off in my palm, cracked in a nook and
separated from my home,
but home is a world
where the walls survive a night of sleep

i’m nervous, even in my dreams where i am
invincible and free,
even in my mind where
i am accepting and courageous

letting us hear the sound of the cut,
the switch in and out,
is deliberate

the crossing of sticks as they
fall from the park’s trees onto the
sloping hills

i know exactly when it ended
a stray question from a stranger
was really a question i asked myself
my answer willed the existence into existence

there are an infinite number of
perspectives on this side of the
window but none of them are looking out

do you understand, my uncle said,
tapping me on the back

the bus sags to the corner
and all of the doors open

and this rain
feels familiar
and this i, whatever it is
has definitely been this rain
and has definitely fallen here
or nearby

the hunt results in a thick
head squished between
obstacles

i blink and chatter my teeth
in the quiet backyard,
the urban garden, and in outdoor
dining cubbies

you can see outside, then just past that is the
reflection of the room behind you, and past
that is the reality of the boardwalk and the ocean.

it takes you a minute but you work your
way diligently through the layers, remembering
how you got there, so you’ll be able to get back.

a dim harmonic
to the ecstasy of the room is present

i’m no movie,
i’m no way forward.
i’m staring up for as long as my back
and my wild legs
will let me.